Local man really, really ready for hurricane season

LAHAINA -- In a show of radical over preparation, Lahaina resident Lance Dupree donned water wings and a swimming cap this week, stating he was officially ready for hurricane season.

As other neighbors purchased bottled water and stocked canned goods, Dupree adamantly vowed not to remove the flotation devices until the six-month long storm season ends in November.

“I saw what happened in Houston, in New Orleans. Sure everyone’s laughing at me now, but when the storm surge comes, boy are you all going to look stupid!”.

Dupree added that as he’s already safe from any tropical mischief Mother Nature can conjure, he’s currently in preparation for the forthcoming flu season, and is in a vigorous eBay bidding war with germAfobe74 for his own hermetically sealed personal bubble. Read the whole story by clicking here!